Title: Growing Awareness
Pairing: LingxEd
Rated: PG-13

—

Ling’s eyes opened in surprise when Ed abruptly spun on his heel, metal fist rounding forward into a punch that would have likely put the prince into what had become their provisional hospital at Doctor Nox’s house if not for Ling’s reflexes. He ducked, falling to the left before rolling onto his feet.

“Edward,” he said, flipping back when Ed’s foot swung for his face. “What are you-?” His hands caught Ed’s arm and twisted it-although not enough to actually hurt the blond-before shoving the infuriated young man face down into the carpet and pinning him with a knee in his back.

Ed’s shouts reverberated off the walls and Ling sincerely hoped the rooms next to theirs were empty. The last thing he wanted was an audience. The bed was still stained and rumpled and the air in the room was sour with the lingering odor of sweat and sex.

“Why are you attacking me?” he asked over Ed’s tantrum.

Ed twisted beneath him in an agile move that Ling wouldn’t have thought the blond capable of except that he was suddenly free and Ling was lying on his back, staring up into Ed’s furious eyes.

“I can’t do this anymore,” he said, his voice low and rough and wavering just noticeably before he pushed to his feet and turned again to leave.

“Why?”

Ed paused, his hand on the doorknob. What could he say? Because these intimate moments were starting to mean more to him than just an afternoon fuck? Because when Ling’s hair laid spread out across the pillow, he wanted to bury his face in the dark mass and feel the soft strands against his cheek; or because he wanted to press his mouth to that smooth neck and breathe deeply of Ling’s earthy scent? Ed shook his head. It was an attachment he didn’t want and if he’d been infuriated by the way Ling had casually waved him off resulting in their little tussle, then that was just misplaced frustration.

“Because I have a promise to keep to Al and this is only a distraction.” He opened the door and shut it firmly behind him, pretending not to have heard Ling’s sharp gasp that had echoed the ache in his chest.

***

Ling sat with his legs splayed out before him, running his fingers in an agitated fashion through his hair which fell in disheveled waves over his shoulders, still loose from their recent…exertions. He tilted his head and stared in puzzlement at the door from which Ed had just left, wondering what he’d said to set the blond off.

Edward was such a volatile little guy, he thought fondly. The tiniest thing could set him off (including the use of the word ‘tiny’) and Ling couldn’t deny the surprising pleasure he found in watching Edward’s face screw up in annoyance or exasperation or anger or any other number of intense emotions the blond seemed to have in abundance…including passion.

Instead of getting up, he lay back on the floor, his clothes sliding over the carpet with a soft hiss. He closed his eyes, recalling the way the blond’s head tilted back, strands of sweat-soaked blond hair clinging to his forehead, when Ling pushed into him…the way his bright eyes squeezed shut and then fluttered open as Ling moved over him…the way the muscles in his chest rippled and bunched and his fingers dug into Ling’s narrow hips when he came.

Ling allowed himself a lazy smile at the memory before contemplating the look on Edward’s face as he’d left. He could understand the blond’s feelings. They each had a mission to complete. The fact that both their goals revolved around acquiring a philosopher’s stone had forced their paths to cross, but that didn’t necessarily mean they had to retain the other’s company.

His main objective superceded any other desires he might have. Edward had helped him-even though it’d been unwillingly-in his quest and he was grateful, so he should just let things lie and move on. He was a prince of Xing. Such sentimental attachments were beneath him. Edward was not from his country and so it was unnecessary to cultivate with the blond the same kind of loyalty he shared with Lanfan.

Ling sighed. Even so…it was unbecoming of a prince to lie to himself.

Jumping nimbly to his feet, he left via the window, making sure to leave it open to air out the scents still heavy in the room.

***

“Er-”

The sound went unacknowledged.

Ling shuffled his feet and coughed loudly. He could see Edward’s shoulders stiffen. He even fancied himself noticing the dusting of fine gold hairs at the nape of Edward’s neck stand on end.

However, the blond still refused to acknowledge his presence.

He sighed. “Edward.”

That blond head snapped around. Ling blinked as he was suddenly the recipient of a withering glare, although on Ed it was really rather cute. Ling grinned in appreciation. Ed was not amused.

“What do you want?” he hissed before turning away just as quickly to rebury his nose in his book. His braid whipped through the air to curl over his shoulder.

Ling cocked his head, letting his gaze wander up the rows and rows of books lining the library shelves. “I thought I’d join you.”

Fixing a welcoming smile on his face, he sat down beside Ed’s hunched but stiff back and rested his head in the palm of his hand, content to simply watch the blond pretend to read.

After several long moments in which Ling continued to stare, completely undaunted by Ed’s glares, the blond finally slammed down his book and leaned forward so that his eyes, snapping in anger, were but an inch away from Ling’s.

“Why are you pestering me? There is no reason for you to keep me company.” He stood, clutched his book to his chest and stomped away, his booted footsteps echoing loudly in the mostly empty library.

Ling sighed. Apparently, he’d have to go about this another way.

***

A small line formed between his brows as Ed awoke to the certainty that the mattress had just dipped beside him. Sure enough, a warm arm snaked around his waist and pulled him flush against an equally warm body.

He contemplated turning around and thoroughly kicking Ling’s ass for his presumptuousness but then realized that the prince couldn’t have gotten in without Al noticing seeing as his little brother didn’t sleep. He lifted his head just enough to glance across the room. The huge luminous armor was gone.

“Your brother was kind enough to let me in and let us talk. He said you’ve been moodier than normal lately,” Ling whispered, his mouth so close that his breath warmed the shell of Ed’s ear.

“Ling, I’m going to kill you if-”

“I just want to talk, Edward,” Ling said, his thumb rubbing the stretch of bare skin above the waist of his pajama bottoms where his shirt had ridden up.

Ed squeezed his eyes shut. That damned thumb smoothing over his skin was distracting… he should really kick Ling out of his bed, out of his room, and out of his life. He sighed. Hadn’t he made it clear the last time that it would be the last time?

The royal idiot had no idea how much will it had taken to keep walking after he’d shut the door, how his hands had shaken for hours afterward as he’d struggled with the idea of never touching that dark hair again. He’d actually had to remind himself of his promise to Al, and Ling, no matter how much he might want it otherwise, did not calculate into those goals.

It had been three days since their encounter, during which he’d had to recondition himself and focus more fully on his task, and now Ling wanted to talk?

“There’s nothing-”

Ling’s hand slid up his chest and closed firmly over his mouth, cutting him off mid-sentence. “Just listen. If you still want me to leave afterward, then I’ll go.”

Ed tried to lift his arms, but Ling had somehow managed to pin them to his sides with nothing but the strength of his own limbs. He fumed in silence.

“Please, Edward.”

Ed closed his eyes, letting out a harsh breath through his nose. He could count the number of times that word had passed through Ling’s lips with one hand-disregarding moments when he’d moaned it during sex.

There was something in the way Ling had said his name just then that also made him pause. He’d probably regret it but…

He nodded and Ling’s hand fell from his lips to rest on the pillow.

“I know you think this doesn’t mean anything to me,” he began and Ed grew even stiffer in his arms. “And I almost wish you were right. This shouldn’t mean anything to me.”

“Then why are you here?” Ed asked, squirming to put some space between their bodies but Ling refused to let him budge.

“Because you were wrong. I can’t just let you walk away. I should…but I can’t.”

Neither of them knew what would happen when all was said and done and Ling returned to Xing to claim the throne over his various siblings. For all they knew, they wouldn’t even live to see the end of all their striving. But regardless, the end result was that to pursue anything more between them would be senseless.

“This is dumb, Ling. We shouldn’t even be having this conversation. It was fun while it lasted, but I have a promise I need to keep-”

“And I have a throne I need to secure, but until then…I’ve found…” Ling abruptly rolled Ed to his back, moving to cover the blond’s body with his own.

Ed scowled up at him before his eyes, a dark amber in the scarce lighting, widened as Ling’s face drew closer.

“Look me in the eye and tell me this doesn’t mean anything to you,” he said. Beneath him, Ed shivered as Ling’s lips grazed his.

“It doesn’t matter what this means to me,” Ed whispered. “Fact is-”

“Don’t give me facts, Edward,” Ling hissed, his dark brows narrowing, eyes pleading for the blond to understand. “Give me honesty.”

Ed’s lips flattened into a frustrated line. “You want honesty, fine. I hate how you make me feel.”

“How do I make you feel, Edward?” Ling asked, lowering his head just a fraction so that his lips moved against the smooth skin of Ed’s cheek.

Ed’s eyes closed and he fisted his hands to keep them from trembling. It was sickening to feel so weak. He didn’t hate everything about what Ling did to him-but the prince didn’t need to know that. He squeezed his eyes tighter as Ling’s hand combed idly through his hair, twisting the golden strands between his fingers. This had to qualify as…psychological warfare or something. Ed had no doubt Ling would someday make a formidable ruler.

With lots of women. Making lots of babies. Far, far away from Amestris and Ed.

Ed growled, his hands rising to grab fistfuls of Ling’s shirt. He was so going to hate himself in the morning.

He turned his head so that his mouth slid across Ling’s and they fell into each other with a desperation they both felt so acutely that their clothes practically flew off in their need to feel skin pressed to skin. Ling sighed into his mouth, mumbling something that Ed was too incoherent to really hear. It was quick and it was rough, both straining for more than just that brief pinnacle of white hot pleasure.

Ling knew that if he at least had this, he might someday have Edward’s heart as well, and even though Ed knew that they were spiraling towards an ending that promised heartache and little else, he couldn’t help turning into Ling’s touch, yearning for that warmth he didn’t feel when lying against his brother’s back. He didn’t know how he’d feel in the morning, but for now… this pleasure, these brief moments of indulgence-it had to be enough.

The End.